Mark 4:19 …But the cares of the world and the deceitfulness of riches and the desires for other things enter in and choke the word, and it proves unfruitful.
This journey began exactly 3 years ago when I was driven in a Toyota Succeed to the ADD building of the University of Nairobi. I still remember the words of my dad when he bade me goodbye after a lengthy day of registration and a fruitless frantic search for accommodation, “you have been a good man, keep on being good.” He then gave me Kshs. 8,000 half of which I was to pay for accommodation in case I got allocated a room and the other half to survive! And that’s how my campus days began.
In 6 months I will be done with campus and essentially, done with school life. In 6 months, I will begin to live and depend entirely on myself to edge a living and pay my bills. In 6 months I will start making decisions ‘for my house’ and in many of those, I will seldom consult mum and dad. In 6 months the society will start pouncing on me. This guy who went to campus, does he have a job now? Who is he working for? Which estate is he living in? Oh, he went back to the village? Who does that?! I hear that he was a CU member, does he still go to church? When does he plan to get us a girl?
So I thought about my first own home, or should I call it a house. I don’t want to live in a dingy single room or an uncoordinated bed seater. I want a big house. Big in this case is a one bed-roomed house with a balcony. I want to move into a house where there is a couch, a warm carpet, a water dispenser, a small fridge, a gas cooker not a meko, a 32” flat screen digital TV, a 5X6 bed, bought along Ngong road, I want, I want…
Then I thought about my first job. I want a flexible job. Flexible here means I can wake up on Wednesday and decide not to go to work and still get away with it, provided I showed up at the office at least two thirds of the month, I want a job that pays me a salary that would make me a motivational speaker walking around and saying how much ‘a vision’ can land you ‘there.’ I want a job where I could replace the boss with the touch of a button, I want, I want.
Inevitably, I thought about my first car. Am a Kikuyu, so it will be a Toyota (lets laugh together), a Mark II because my father owns one. I want a KB something, with comfy seats and 18” rims. A car that I could drive near campus so that the guys I leave behind will he ‘how much I have progressed with life.’ I want a car that costs just as much as I can afford with all my specifications. I want a car that runs on gas not fuel, a car that will never be pushed on the highway because it failed to start. I want a car that…that’s all, I want, I want.
Yes! I did think about my wife, no, actually, I thought about my wedding. It should be our wedding but I thought of it as mine. I want a white wedding, one, in a big church, two, my bride to be ridden in a white horse drawn chariot, three, photo shoot be done in sarova white sands and reception at Windsor, honeymoon week one in Seychelles and week two in Paris…first child a son and then twins girls, identical…I want, I want.
Now, I should think about my wife. Will she be Indian or black American? Apple or pear? How about her smiles, like that of my mother? Will she be the sweet, beautiful, glorious and amazing Eve that came out of Adam’s rib or will she be the cunning Eve that will bring me a fruit she’s bitten? Will she love me as much as I will love her? Could she bear me (ME) twins? What will be her name (misplaced priorities)? Angela or Hadassah or Amina or Pia?
What is life all about anyway? All the above? I hope not! I don’t want to live a life that is obsequious. Empty and devoid of any real things or people. I don’t want to live in a house full of gadgets but not having the peace, the peace of God. I don’t want to work for the sake of the money or the reputation. I don’t want to drive a car and that just about it. Cars are good but they are just about up to that, good. I don’t want to do a wedding that is a block buster, I just want to bring people together to celebrate a journey of love. I don’t want just a wife, I want a woman who is inculcated with value and nobility, one who is the enigma of a princess, whose value only the King of kings could pay for (in moments like this, I pause and say, Thank you Jesus).
There is more to life. Am born to be happy and more importantly to fulfil the purpose of God that He made me for. My life, my wife, our children, my property, my career, my ministry and every other my have but one role, to give glory to God. I have absolutely no business running after the wind and chasing the things sought after by men. My standards will be informed of two virtues; godliness and integrity. I intend to enviably and jealously guard these two all my days under the sun.
I refuse to be a scarecrow. I will not fashion myself with mediocre thinking and mundane activities whose fruit is fit only for scavengers. I dare to be resilient with my goals and purpose. To think! To nurture myself and leave behind me footsteps worth walking in. I have spent too much to be where I am today, and that was not me spending, there are people who have tirelessly invested their time, money and space in me. I intend to do so for many more.
Quoting Charles Spurgeon, “He who climbs above the cares of this world and turns his face to God has found the sunny side of life.” I don’t just want, I intend to. To think, to plan, to be. Godliness and integrity. So help me God.
Romans 12:2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.